Fantasy

I was talking with my yoga teacher about fantasies. She reckons it's the last social taboo, things like women fantasising about rape or sex with children. I sat there during this chat thinking about my fantasies. I shocked a priest when I told him I wanted by dad and brother dead. I was 13 at the time when I fantasised about that. In my last counselling session I was talking about my mother. She could be a real bitch to me. She's dead now. My counsellor said, "If she was in the room with us now, what would you do?"
"I'd kill her."
I don't know how many times I would have to do that in order to be satisfied that justice has been done. I haven't missed the point that she's dead already but I still want to kill her off in my head.